The Government Tender

by Roland Hemming

Thank you for wishing to apply to work on this Government Project. We use a streamlined procurement process to make the process easy.

This tender is for the supply of services of audio systems, lighting, video, staging, cleaning materials, transport, security barriers, equestrian equipment and services not limited to, but limited to those mentioned above. Fill in this form online using black ink only. You may access instructions for completing this tender any time by leaving this page and going to the following LINK. DO NOT LEAVE THIS PAGE WHILST FILLING IN THIS TENDER or the systems will reset and you will have to start again. If you are a framework services supplier please fill in sections 1 to 13, 27 and 31 to 57. DO NOT fill in sections 24 or 27. Fill in the final sections in reverse order. If you are a specialist services provider fill in all other odd numbered sections, except those where you are not permitted to do so (where applicable). To ascertain whether you are specialist services provider or a framework services provider please consult the UK Government advice note A2457A, unless your company was incorporated before July 1992.

This page will expire in 15 minutes. Failure to fill in the entire tender in the time available will result in the systems being reset and you will have to start again.

With apologies to Bill Bryson

Your Team

For each key team member working on the project please give full name, date of birth, gender, hair colour, collar size, religion, details of both relevant industry and non-industry experience, work on other UK government projects except UK dependant territories, UK territorial territories and UK Crown dependant territories. Include full career history, education, qualifications, dietary requirements, hobbies and any awards or citations, except those exempt under Regulation 47R Please do not include CVs as these contain unnecessary information and your application will be deemed invalid and you will not be permitted to submit further tenders for a period of five years. Your personnel data must match the total of essential staff (non-critical) and critical staff (non-essential) that you entered in 14 J and K. If staff numbers do not match, this form will reset and you will have to start again.

Company Profile

You may upload a profile document outlining your company services. This must be in portrait mode with margins no less than 1.1 inches on the left and 18mm top and bottom. Print must be visible in 300 LUX at a distance of 38cm. Provide evidence of readability. Acceptable formats include PaperClip, Locoscript or Gobe. Microsoft Word or PDFs will not be accepted due to security concerns.

Project Data

For your convenience, project data is available from the following FTP site. The download is 950GB and contains 37,500 documents. All project documents are in one ZIP file. The files use a coded naming system with no sub folders. The download includes ceiling plans, floor plans, sections, plumbing details, wall colours, carpet swatches, network diagrams, sketches, satellite photos, rejected drawings and obsolete designs. Please review the appropriate documents to enable you to price this project.


Please detail any legal action or contract infractions during the course of your business over the last 25 years. This is not limited to civil and criminal proceedings, liquidated damages, parking tickets and speeding fines by any member of staff either during the course of their duties or outside.

Financial Information

Please include financial statements since your company was founded. Sections 103 to 107 include projected income and profit for the next twelve years with full evidence of those projections. To indicate company stability you must demonstrate a margin of at least 15% on each project that you carry out.

Provide insurance certificates for public liability, products liability, insurers liability, professional indemnity. We require a minimum cover on all policies of £500m. Small businesses (those with a turnover of less than £3.6 billion) may apply for an insurance exemption reduction by applying to the Department of Trade in writing.


Bidders must demonstrate a margin of no more than 5% on all items. We require assurance of a 15-year warranty on all items, including consumables. List all project items with product name, Amazon link, quantity, price, colour, country of origin, weight (boxed and unboxed), power consumption, instruction manual, datasheet, 3D drawings, heat output, dimensions, materials used and means of disposal. Failure to include all product information will render your submission invalid and you will be barred from applying from all UK Government tenders for a period of no less than fifteen years. We require that you keep the pricing given in this tender valid for a period of 36 months.

Adherence to Standards

This project complies with BS 7829, 7830, 81930 (withdrawn), EN 6000027 parts 1 to 14, the Department of Trade Purple guide and the Ladybird Book of Sound Engineering. Please provide evidence of ownership of all relevant standards including any future standards and draft legislation.